Ok, so I promised before that perhaps I'd be back later with more, and sure enough, here I am. So what's new you ask? C'mon, you know you were gonna ask...ok, well, pretend like you were gonna ask...

Ok, I'm gonna get the darkest thought out of the way so hopefully I can get past it and move on to something funnier. I thought of how I'd commit suicide tonight. I offered (mistake #1) to take Laura out to the new mall here in Des Moines tonight, it's out in Waukee on the border between the urban area that is Des Moines and the bare nothingness that stretches from here to the Omaha area. The new mall is hell. There's one crappy video game store, and a Hot Topic, which exists at both of the other malls in Des Moines. Then there's an Express, an Aeropostale, a Fossil, an Abercrombie, a Buckle and every other goddamn hellhole Laura routinely is drawn to. There's not a Gap, miraculously. But there's absolutely NOTHING I found of even moderate interest and couldn't have found at a mall closer to home.

Anyway, back to the earlier point. If I ever decide it's time to give up and end things, I'm gonna go gather a big pile of clothes at the Buckle. Then I'm gonna get myself a changing room and hang myself in there. I'm gonna leave a note that says "Your goddamn pink tinted lighting made me do it." I'm serious. The pink tinted lighting in the Gap, and Express, and the Buckle depresses me in ways I had previously thought would only be possible if someone died. I still feel out of sorts.

But on to brighter things. If you knew my plans for the new apartment, here's what's different:

I painted one room (the bedroom) instead of 4, and continue to debate Laura to keep the remaining rooms unpainted, mainly cause painting is a pain, and also because everything we paint now has to be painted back before we leave.

We're mostly moved in, had an extended debate over the proper position of my desk, but the move in went mainly without conflict...it's just a lot of work, and we're not quite done yet...we're still looking for a couch and a dresser, Goodwill failed us utterly tonight (wanting $99.99 for an old beat up dresser is absurd) .

I'll leave you with something funny. Laura and I's 8-month anniversary is tomorrow, and there weren't going to be gifts, but Laura and I found a t-shirt I had to have at the mall...it's a baseball-style t-shirt with the long dark sleeves on a white t-shirt, and it says "Have you seen my weiner?" and has a picture of a weiner dog on it. :-) Weiner dogs rock.

Please don't expose me to any more pink lighting.
This has been KL Snow.

Ok, it's been a while, maybe I'll be back for more later, but now it's time for

AN ALL NEW ONE ACT PLAY BY KL SNOW!

KL and LAURA are in their apartment. LAURA is complaining about her closet space. Almost half her closet is occupied by shoes.

LAURA: But I like shoes!
KL: And I like comic books. But the day comic books take up half my closet, a decision will have to be made.
LAURA: But you can't wear comic books.
KL: And you can't read shoes.
LAURA: Touche.

Humor concludes. This has been KL Snow.

OK, this is the last post from Wisconsin for what will probably be a long time. But do I ever have stories to tell...well, anecdotes, really. Here's the first one, an all new One Act Play!

This one takes place on the same set as a previous one act play, with KL at his computer having a conversation with ROBIN (scoobydrlp). The conversation goes as follows:

TheEvilKL: Six days from today Laura and I will be together again...
scoobydrlp: woohoo!
TheEvilKL: I just need to make it six more days...
scoobydrlp: you can do it
scoobydrlp: here, I got a joke for ya that will help you last for 6 more days
scoobydrlp: A bear and a rabbit go into the woods to take a shit.
scoobydrlp: the bear says to the rabbit, "Hey rabbit, do you ever have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"
TheEvilKL: LOL....where were they before? An IHOP?
scoobydrlp: lol, lemme finish before I respond to any questions
TheEvilKL: lol, k
scoobydrlp: The rather refined rabbit said, "Well no, no I don't."
TheEvilKL: Is this joke gonna end with the bear using the rabbit to wipe his ass?
scoobydrlp: dammit!
scoobydrlp: I said lemme finish!
scoobydrlp: :D
TheEvilKL: Sorry, I'd heard it. :-)
scoobydrlp: hehe
scoobydrlp: I laughed
TheEvilKL: I do think my first question was the more pertinent one though...if a bear and a rabbit went into the woods, where were they coming from?
scoobydrlp: actually, I thought that same thing as I was typing it to send to you
scoobydrlp: I'm thinking they were probably at walmart.
TheEvilKL: Perhaps. But y'know what else?
scoobydrlp: huh?
TheEvilKL: Michigan Mayhem (CBA) - Named Reggie Fox coach, pending league approval.

Anyway, after that conversation I went to work. My last day at work. So, as was to be expected, I goofed around, a lot. Actually, at one point I felt kinda bad, cause I was given a shiny new pin to put on my vest for the good work I did yesterday while I was in mid-prank on someone else. But anyway, to show they loved me, instead of punishing me for being a total goof on my last day, they gave me a job where I could goof around as much as I wanted. That's right, they made me a greeter.

With that intro, here's Today's Other One Act Play!

(WARNING: This One Act has a very large cast.)
KL is guarding the doors at WAL MART. BOB is the other greeter. KEITH is a stockman. BEE is assistant manager. SHOPLIFTER is...well, duh.

SHOPLIFTER pushes a cart, loaded with stuff, past the cashiers and out the door, past BOB.
BOB yells and turns around to follow SHOPLIFTER.
SHOPLIFTER accelerates and runs out into traffic in the parking lot, where his cart is hit and tipped over by a gray SUV.
BOB, KEITH and BEE catch up with SHOPLIFTER as KL watches from a fair distance, still guarding the doors.
BOB and BEE both stop and try to talk SHOPLIFTER into giving up.
KEITH runs in and tackles SHOPLIFTER, actually lifting him out of his shoes.
KL: Wow, that's hardcore.

Humor concludes. This has been KL Snow.